The Art Of Becoming

Intro

Another year has begun, so the concept of new beginnings is fresh on everyone’s mind, including my own. Recently, I’ve just been speaking and thinking about the difference in result from a thought and an action. Reading this statement, you might have rolled your eyes and thought, duh, but the human mind is very strange, so it struggles to grasp many simple concepts. That’s why those midnight “I’m going to change my life” sessions can be just as fulfilling mentally as actually changing your life. The only difference is that one is far shorter lived, barely making it into the next morning.

It is because change isn’t a one time decision that holds for the rest of your life. Genuine change comes from choosing it actively every day. You will not miraculously become a morning person or all of a sudden be able to run a marathon. You have to take the steps towards that goal, and that’s not easy. That comes from sacrifice. To gain, you have to sacrifice.

The primary reason many people don’t stay consistent is because their drive is drawn from feelings, feelings which are fleeting and often lead to nothing because they don’t have backing. They don’t have genuine reason, no raw foundation.

To succeed in a goal, your determination must flow from a good place with solid foundation and deep commitment. For me, that looks like placing my life in the hands of Jesus and living in line with Him, because He is the gold standard for goodness, strength, and success.

After identifying your foundation, your goals become clearer and what you have to do is marked on your path, so now you have to become it. You can do this using a very popular three step framework. BE, who you are, who you envision yourself to be. DO, what are the behaviours of the person that you aim for, what actions get you there. HAVE, genuine achievement.

BE

The beginning is very hard because you start to confront your mind immediately. The work starts off mental. Before you set on a journey towards a goal, you must ready your mind to achieve it even when it gets harder. You can’t ready it enough because we always tend to underestimate how hard things are, but you must lay the foundations of trust in God and His love for you, so that when times get tough, you will always have something to fall back on.

But this is also where many people get stuck. They come up with all sorts of reasons not to do something and begin doing mental gymnastics to claim the odds were stacked against them from the start.

That doubt, that thought that you might fail, that’s the first sign that the path you’re on is the right one. It is a sign of your discomfort, your fear, but God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. So when faced with that fear, keep a sound mind and lead yourself back to the truth of who the Bible tells you you are.

My pastor mentioned recently, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it can’t change you.” You cannot grow when all you do is indulge in comfort, and that isn’t exclusive to laziness. For me, it was the idea of being seen as anything but perfect. I struggled with the idea of posting online because I thought it was cringe for a man to do. Some parts of me still do.

That fear of being cringe, mixed with a corrupt idea of perfection, forced me into inaction, where I only made justifications on why I didn’t do something and patted myself on the shoulder for it. Little did I know I was stifling my own growth, because you have to start things and be bad at them for a while before you get good. People’s problems are not unique, so the difference between you and someone that has achieved what you want to achieve is that they already started and made it through the mud. They’ve done the work that blossomed and others now call luck.

DO

To be something you're not yet is having faith, but faith without works is dead, and that’s why this year’s goal for me is just to do more. Say yes to more opportunities that can grow me, reach out to more people I can learn from, attend more events I can be productive in, just generally creating more room and opportunity for God’s glory to be displayed in my life.

But not just do more mindlessly, to do more with the intention of learning. The phrase “the doer alone learneth,” because the goal is not just to achieve one thing and call it quits, but rather to grow continuously. To learn what I don’t know that I don’t know, to gain insights on things I didn’t know even existed. And that can only be achieved by doing more. You have to actually do things to see where you are, what you need to improve, and learn even from the act of doing. But your actions must carry conviction. They must have direction. If not, there will be a lot of wasted effort in environments you had no business in. You must first trust God. Trust that He will come through for you. Trust that what you’re doing is not in vain, and trust that what He says is true.

Step out in faith, out of your current situation, out of your comfort zone, and do the work to build the things you want, and live the way you feel God guiding you.

This doesn’t mean instant gratification, so do not be discouraged if you are not immediately great at whatever you start, because mistakes are natural. Failure is humane, and to avoid both completely is cowardice and will make you stagnant.

In moments of uncertainty, it is normal to doubt yourself, what you’re doing, the situation, but you should always remember who stands beside you, who has said they will never leave nor forsake you. That is the time to lean in deeper in your faith and trust, because when you do become successful at what you do, and you will, it will be that much more gratifying.

Alex Hormozi said the phrase, “If someone is doing better than you, they are better in some way,” and even though this lacks some nuance depending on the situation, it is generally true. Be it execution or starting point or connections, they are doing something better, but you can compensate by learning, observing, and doing more.

You just have to start and keep going.

HAVE

In your pursuit for happiness or after you achieve your goal, it is also very important that you don’t lose track of what is important. Even when you have achieved the goal, do not forget by whose grace you got there. Yes, you weathered the storms, but who gave you the strength to do that, who calmed them when they began to overwhelm you, who never left your side in times where you needed someone the most.

Do not begin to get conceited because of what you have done. Yes, you should be proud of your work, but be more proud of your faith and your diligence, because those things will multiply your work in ways even you can’t yet see.

I close off in prayer that God may bless your work and that his favor grants you success in all you do. So step out in faith and do not worry about whatever excuse you made in your head to hold yourself back. Just start.

If you’re still hesitant, look within yourself and ask, “Why not now?”